First of all I am a 25 year old female, I am a model/musician/artist and I work in finance, so I'm not unnatractive and I'm not an idiot and NO I do not think there is anything wrong with ME.

About my relationship, I started dating a childhood friend recently, we got together about 7 months ago and fell in love quite quickly.. I've known him for 16 years so It wasnt as hard and didnt seem as strange to fall in love so fast with someone you felt you already knew for such a long time.

The first two months when we were just dating we probably had sex a total of 6-8 times, and we were together almost EVERY day! This was a bit of a problem but I just sort of rolled with it hoping that it would improve.
Once we actually became bf/gf we went a period of close to TWO months without having sex.. TWO MONTHS!!! let me say this again TWO MONTHS (by the way hes 25 years old as well, should have the sex drive of a rabbit)
So, I bring it up to him and I let him know that I am not satisfied with this relationship (sexually) and I try to let him understand that he can talk to me about whatever it is that I may be doing or NOT doing to help him, by the way he had a bit of a drug problem at the beginning which I pegged the sex problem on (special k) until his sister in law told me that, this has been going on far longer than him and I,... and ex gfs had complained about the same thing.

So, after I tell him if things don't improve eventually that I cannot continue on this relationship, Because I'm willing to wait but only if I beleive that there would actualy be change... so Things DO start to improve and we start to do it 2-3 times a week.. THAT to me was amazing!! from going from nothing at all... even though im used to ex's not being able to keep there hands off me and having sex 4 times a day every day.. but liek I said any improvement was good for me.

So I told him at the beginning of our relationship that I do not like porn, I think that its degrading to woman, its made just for men because really in what world does a woman want 13 guys standing around her making her choke on there dicks? while cumming in her eye balls (that stings and you look like you have pink eye for a few days afterwards, not that i would know or anything tehe

So I told him that my ex husband and I had MAJOR problems with porn, mostly due to the fact that my husband did nothing but jerk off all day to it while i was at work supporting the both of us, and also after i had surgery and i was sick.
I told him, that I KNOW that hes not going to stop watching it but for my sake and my sanity and my feelings please dont watch it all the time considering we barely have sex as it is, and if he is going to watch it to please dont leave it open on his laptop for me to see when im checking my emails and to please NOT download it when im over at his house.. because its rude and disrespectful to me.

He aggreed said that he would do any of those things to spare my feelings, even after I didnt even ask him to QUIT porn, which I would really prefer but I know will never happen... He did it anyways.
I was at his house laying in bed, and he was sitting on his couch downloading porn, when he left the room i went to check my mail and saw it open, I just closed it and didnt say anything and later he knew what was wrong wit hme and asked me about it, we got into a fight and broke up for a bout 2 days.. not long.

We get back together, I tell him how it makes me feel that he obviously is haivng sexual thoughts but not about or for me because I'm 10 feet away and hed rather watch some (by the way ugly low budget zits on the ass girls) girls on a screen then come over an initiate something with me.

He understand why im upset after I tell him " what if i did that to you" that usually seems to work with men, mainly my bf in general.. and he said he would do that to me again out of respect.

so 4 months go by or so, i know he watches porn i dont say anythign about it.. even though it eats at me a bit each time i run across it.. our sex life is doing OKAY i guess, then we move in together about a month ago, we are living together we are pretty fresh in our relationship and we are young we should be doing it in every room... we lived together over a week and a half before we had sex, and then when we did it was after a fight, thats when he seems to want to do it the most.

Last friday He took off work and said he wasnt feeling very good, he stayed home and played poker all day online and talked to me on msn, his sister in law told me he was drinking beer..at 10am by the way, and when i get home i look at the laptop to see what he was really doing and he was watching porn ALLLLLLLLLLLL ****ING DAY!!! I'm talking from when I left for work until just before I got home from work, I found some stuff about Barely legal teen and Teen girl gets gang banged or something ****ing crude liek that, i looked at it to see what he was trying to watch and noticed that thse barely legals who are prob about 18 look like 13-14 year old girls in pigtails and school girl type outfits... THIS is what set me off, I probably wouldnt have said anythign about the porn, and if i had i wouldnt have really gotten that mad i would have just been a bit bitter but this **** he was watching that looks like little girls just SET ME OFF! I told him that I am young and I shouldnt be made to feel like I hve to compete with children, I shouldnt have to feel like I'm too old for him cause he would rather give it to some kid... and I told him that it was sick behaviour for him to be looking at **** liek that and if he had a daughter he would probably shoot a man for looking at her or subjecting his to that kind fo thing... we fought for a few days, then made up and he said he wouldnt watch that **** anymore, he actually told me that he wouldnt watch porn all together anymore but I told him that was not necessary and that I just didnt liek the teen **** because I felt it was perverted (not in the way all porn is peverted but pedophile perverted) and he aggreed.

SOOOO we have sex I think the next day after we make up, twice in one day and THAT is ALOT for us!! lol and then the other day Im in the shower and I have this weird feeling hes up to something weird because he turns the sound off on his laptop when he was playing poker and listening to music, I get out of the shower and go lay down and he comes into the room kisses me on the head and go goes back to the livignroom, the next day I find out that while i was in the shower he was watching PORNO again, while i was home instead of coming to me for it.

He obviously has addiction issues to it, he has all kinds of addiction issues, porn/gambling/drugs/alcohol.
which the alcohol consumption has been minimal once we started getting more serious because i rarely drink, and the drugs aswell because I wont tolerate it.. and the gambling thing I dont surpress because its pretty harmless unless hes spending all his money on it then i would step in, but the porn thing is affecting our relationship.. hes become desensitized to real sex, and when he watches porn alot of the tme he doenst even masterbate.. that there is a tell tail sign that there is something wrong.. its all mental with him, hes formed this obsession with images of things which I find degrading.. even though I do whatever he wants in the bedroom as far as oral sex, any positions he wants and pretty much whatever hole he wants aswell... as crude as that sounds... but hed rather watch some girl getting fisted .. im talking like two big fists in the vagina or the ass, or some girl being choked by a penis until she almost throws up, I sometiems prefer that he watch this stuff then try it on me..

But its all now affecting me not only physically but emotionally, Im numbing myself to hurt less, Im thinking of doing things out of spite to show him how it feels so he can know what its like if I would rather look at other men and fantasize about other people then about actually having sex with him, but then i think to myself that im a much better person than that and as I dont deserve to feel this way neither does he, even though he is the one inflicting the pain on me.

So anyways, that is my story...

So long I know, so what do you all think of this situation??

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Banned Before Bored

you didnt look like a female to me

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ill have you know irl most look on me as a beacon of normalcy

You really don't get FICTION, do you, Mike.



This goes a long way to explain your Pentacostal Beliefs that Jimmy Swaggart is the Second Messiah.

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Banned Before Bored

jimmy swaggart is a bad man

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ill have you know irl most look on me as a beacon of normalcy

He's sorry.

Both you and he are Pentacostals that have visited dens of iniquity.

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Banned Before Bored

i was just the octopus

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ill have you know irl most look on me as a beacon of normalcy

Penticoastals are fucking retarded. They think that if youre sick, your faith will heal you. They think that anything bad that happens to non penticoastals obviously has to do with their lack of faith. But when they get cancer or some shit, it isnt because of their lack of faith, but its simply God's Will.

Whenever I see a Penticoastal cough, I tell them that they obviously need Jesus in their lives, that if they had true faith, they wouldnt ever get sick.

You were a GREAT Octopus

I'll be back in October......

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Banned Before Bored